Breaking up can easily be classified as one of the toughest things you may need to go through in your life until that moment. And if you and your partner are living together, things can become even more complicated because one of you, or maybe both of you, will most likely need to move out.
And while moving on after a relationship breakup can be a nightmarish experience, moving out doesn’t have to be all that bad at all. In fact, the following 3 tips for moving out after a breakup will help you organize a more painless house move despite the emotional pain you must be feeling right now.
1. Plan your move accordingly
It’s important to note that each move after a breakup is unique so it’s nearly impossible to offer good advice that will cover all possible separation scenarios. Still, there are some proven practices for moving out after a breakup.
One of the most important things to do after a breakup is to plan your move in the best possible way. Do you expect a fairly peaceful separation? Or do you think the move will be accompanied by plenty of yelling and possibly even fighting over who will keep what things?
By now, you’ll probably have a pretty good idea of what to expect from your partner so you should plan ahead your case of moving away after a breakup.
- COVERT MOVE. If you’re breaking up with a person who you know will cause trouble during the move, you may choose to move out stealthily – that is, little by little, a few boxes at a time, so that most of your things will already be moved to the new place before your partner realizes what’s going on. You may want to use this type of relocation to end a bad relationship without going through unnecessary drama on Moving day.
- SWIFT BREAK. If time has become a crucial factor for you and you just can’t wait any longer to get the move done and over with it, then you’ll be better off performing a clean break. In this separation case, you just opt for hiring professional movers who will come, pack and move all your stuff in one go – quickly and effectively. Get the timing right – for example, when your partner won’t be home so that you don’t make it any harder for yourself.
- MUTUAL BREAKUP. Your relationship may finish on relatively good terms where each of you feels that that should be the end of your life together. If that’s the case, then you should coordinate the pending move with your partner so that no further conflicts complicate the matter at hand. The next step? The division of your mutual belongings.
Useful to know: How to plan a long-distance move
2. Take only what you really need
Moving home after a breakup may turn out to be much more complicated than you thought. If you have a child or children with the person you’re leaving, then you should always seek legal counsel before moving out – failure to do so could put you at risk of losing custody of your children in the future. Never forget for a second that the well-being of your kids is your number one priority, so you must find the best solution ASAP and figure out who your children are staying with.
Moving away after a breakup is always tough, but when there are no children involved, things become much more straightforward. In case of a mutual break-up, the next worry should be how to divide up your property – that is, who gets what. And depending on the cause of the breakup, the way the relationship has ended and the person you’re breaking up with, the division of your shared belongings can range from being fairly hassle-free to very problematic.
As a rule of thumb, you will be entitled to divide evenly the things that you purchased together. If your partner wishes to keep an item that you bought together, then you should get compensated, and vice versa. Of course, in case of monetary compensation, it’s never the original cost that gets halved but rather the current market cost after the age and wear and tear of that item have been factored in.
When moving to a new city after a breakup, be smart about what you choose to move. Take with you only the things you do care about and surely will need in the future. Make an effort not to complicate the heart-breaking task of dividing your mutual stuff – remember that moving more items will increase your packing and moving cost.
But more importantly, you may wish to leave behind all objects that will trigger memories and evoke complicated emotions after the move. In some cases, it may be better for your mental equilibrium to take just a handful of valuable items and start with a blank canvas in the new home.
Read also: How to make a moving inventory
3. Ask close friends to help you move
Moving out after a breakup – especially after a long relationship – will be the ultimate challenge for both of you. There’s no doubt that emotions will be running high throughout the house move, and it won’t be until you move into a safe place and make it yours (understand furnish and decorate it to your own taste) that the healing process can begin.
Until then, you will be extremely vulnerable, so do yourself a favor and don’t handle it all alone. Ask your closest friends and family members to help you make it through that tough, tough period. Their emotional and physical support will mean the world to you. The truth is that the more helpers you get, the faster you’ll be able to complete the move, so don’t turn down any type of assistance offered by your good friends.
When moving away after a breakup, it’s imperative that you establish a support system to count on. Call up your pals and ask them to help you pack up your things. Choose a time when your partner won’t be there to eliminate the possibility of disputes, fights, and stressful or awkward situations.
If you haven’t yet found a good place to move into, then ask your best friend if you can stay at their place for a while until you can get your bearings. If you choose to follow that path, however, it’s a good idea NOT to tell your ex where you are going as you don’t want to transfer the drama into another person’s home.
Also, having your close friends around and being able to talk with them in person about your feelings and emotions will help you move on after the breakup. What’s more, some of them may have gone through similar relationship breakups themselves, so you never know who might give you the best piece of advice.
See also: How to get friends to help you move
BONUS advice after a breakup: Hire movers you can trust
Moving to a new place after a breakup can be a soul-crushing experience for you, with an overdose of strong and often conflicting emotions. Under the circumstances, you may not have the mental strength to organize a house move on your own. The solution is fairly simple: don’t make any compromises but hire professional movers you can trust.
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